Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize