some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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