Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
