I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
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I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
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This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
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