never play flip cup with pint glasses
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
