My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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