some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You need Xanax blowdarts
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
why is half of my head shaved?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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