You smell like a Billy Joel song
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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