I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize