Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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