butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
