the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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