dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
