if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
handjob tips. give me some.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Randomize
