dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
