He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
