No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
