yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
