All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Randomize
