Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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