They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize