How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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