Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
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