She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize
