Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.