I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
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