ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize