i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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