Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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