it wasn't lemon gatorade
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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