Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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