I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
