PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
