question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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