Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I just want to make out with him forever
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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