Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
