1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
