i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
