DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
