ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
it's like heaven, but drunker
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
