just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
