yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
