it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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