If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
