You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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