What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
