Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
