I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
