I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
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and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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