I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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